Life in Balance Changing Lives…Val’s Story
When I first stepped on Life in Balance property, I knew this is where I belonged.
That sentence is a miracle! Why? Because up to that point I had lived a life of abandonment, death, pain, lies –and in my eyes—no love.
I was given up at birth, adopted at three months old, and then my adopted mom died when I was ten. I was sexually molested from a cousin while my mom was in the hospital. By this time, I was already a child who was basically raising a brother and had experienced nothing a child of my age should endure.
I was labeled as depressed, angry, passive-aggressive, ugly, and liar. I spent my teen years and early 20’s doing drugs and building more walls in my heart, living up to all those “labels.” It was easier for me just to keep hiding under those labels, instead of dealing with the hurt in my heart.
I was so angry at God for allowing all the trauma in my life. How could He do this to me? Why was I put here? How could he take mom?
Once I married and began having children, we wanted to raise them to know God. I became involved in the church and with other women. Wow, women! That was the most difficult thing I ever had to do: trust and be involved with other women! I didn’t have good women in my life. All they ever did was either leave or call me names. I didn’t know how to be a good friend or even a good mom, for that matter.
In October of last year, my son was diagnosed with epilepsy. It took several months to get his medicine working to stop the seizures. By February I was falling into a very deep depression. I had tried to be strong for our family and now things were falling into place… but I was not. I was nearing fifty years old, extremely lonely, unhappy, and I couldn’t figure out what my purpose was! I was also having dark dreams and nightmares. I felt like I was constantly under attack. My mask was getting worn and tired. I was in church, in Bible studies, and I still just wanted to stay in bed. What now?
During that time, I had dropped my sons off at their grandparents and drove away. I was driving on a large overpass and had thoughts of driving right over the edge. I was in the darkest place of my life. I was ready to leave everything I loved behind. I had no purpose in my life and believed God was punishing me for my past. Something –Someone –kept me from taking my life in that moment.
I went to a friend at church and shared my heart. I told her that I couldn’t do it anymore. She talked to me and mentioned the Healing Prayer ministry. What about getting together with Marla Truitt? The strange thing was that I’d recently had a dream where I was sharing my story with the Truitt’s at their home! God was speaking to me and preparing me for His healing!
Our friend talked to Marla and asked if she could be a mentor for me. Marla texted me and asked me to come to LIB and walk with her and pray with her.
When I took that first step on this land, God spoke to me! He spoke loud and fierce: Get up and go and see my land!
That day changed my life. I felt it when I started walking this property. God told me that this is where I belong, this is my purpose. I felt peace and love. I had never truly felt that before.
As we were walking and talking, she said to me that she had been praying for a secretary for the Life in Balance board and she believed God was telling her to ask me. I said “absolutely,” without any hesitation. I knew God was taking over.
Since then, I’ve been helping with the secretarial responsibilities at LIB. I’ve been helping on the land with the yard work and event planning. I have found deep laughter here at LIB. I’ve found love and healing. My nightmares have stopped. I have hope and light in my life. God has been blessing in miraculous ways: a changed husband, a new home, a new job.
Philippians 4:13 has become my new way of thinking: “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”
God has shown me that this is it: this Kingdom Living is what it is all about. Life in Balance is where women can come to feel the connection of God; to pray, to heal, to laugh, to trust… to just be.
This land shines God… He is doing many things here. I found my calling with LIB!